angry Normally, I'd open one of these session with something retarded, but that's when I'm Ranting. Hence, the "Ranting Stephen". Today is more like the Venting Stephen. No real focus to anything except me. I'm just gonna say what's on my mind for the next 10 minutes.
Fuck. That's always nice isn't it. Fucky fuck fuck fuck. Read it and eat it like it was some tasty apple pie.
You know, I don't consider myself an angry person. But I have my moments, which last for days at a time. Take this week for instance. I think it started off simple enough. But right around wednesday morning, I fell off an emotional cliff that I didn't know I was walking on. Isn't that an image for you. You think you're walking down a simple street when suddenly you're falling. I keep hitting trees and shit on my way down so I haven't hit the bottom yet. But I don't know how much further there is to go.
The most annoying and repulsive thing about a person is when they are "energy vampires". (stolen from David D, dating Guru). I can't stand these people anymore. They hover around you, constantly chattering about dumb things that aren't funny enough for you to even pretend like you are interested. It's worse when they like you. Not "like" is in want to date you, but think you are just awesome enough to be around more than most people. Then they don't listen when you tell them things like (GO AWAY) and (Why are you touching me?) Now, more than ever, I know where my energy is placed and I want to keep it . Just by invading my personal space you are sucking up my energy. i waste enough of it in a day with my friends when I'm in their faces. But rather than being an energy vampire, I'm feeding them my own energy. It's warm and loving. CAn you feel it? Not so much right now right? Someone is stealing it from me. It's no easy task to keep it circulating and you keep stealing it...GRRRRRRRRARAAAAAAGH
Do you know what a wussy is? I used to be one, of course. Most fools like me are. Hopeless romantics in a world they don't belong. Overly sensitive to their emotions and having ideals of love and relationships that can only come from dreamers such as us. We got this idea from our mothers, most likely, that we are supposed to put women on a pedestal so high and out of reach that we should practically worship the ground they walk on. And we do. But they don't come down from their pedestal to thank us. They glare from the top like hawks. Like I said, I used to be one. I know how we think. I use present tense because to some degree, I still am one. It's a side of me that I can't get rid of without serious brain trauma. But thank God for David D, for showing me the light before my highschool life had truly begun. Without him, I probablyy would have been suicidal by now. Being sad and lonely all the time, unhappy with my life for the greater part of eternity. Love is just that serious to us. And to not have during the most critical points of your life is to be dead. Hollow. A shell. Fucked Up like a semicolon in the middle of a sentence.
What?
Why are people so fucking annoying? Stop asking me stupid ass questions like "Whay aren't you wearing any shoes?" or "Can you comb your hair?" Shut the Fuck up!. I do what I want! Jesus Christ!(that's my most commonly heard phrase at points of extreme emotions. Jesus. He's been here before) I don't want to be a dick to everyone, but I don't tolerate stupid shit. I take smart shits. When I flush it, I think "That's some inteligent shit right there." Don't be a dumbass and I won't ram my dick in it. Got it shit hole? Fuck ! Jesus Christ!
But don't. Jesus would be very mad if you did.
???Huh????
Banana banana banana bananabanbananabanana Wrrooooaaaarrrgh.
I'm against prostitutes. STD's and all you know. But there are times I wish I was the fool around type. (wow. big shocker. I'm not.) Be the second coming of Delaney. Only more refined, classier. Then when I was bored, I could call up some girl and know that I'd have someone who I could talk too who was helplessly attracted to me but I wasn't necessarily all that into. It makes for great conversation. And I know that I'm making her day and she's making mine. See the balance? Like Daoism.
If I had a sexy girlfriend, I'd be a role model. If I had a hot girlfriend, I'd be cool. If I had a pretty girlfriend, I'd be smart. If I had an average looking girlfriend, I'd be content. But I've got none of the above so I'm just weird. But that's not so bad.
'the fuck's up with my pinky? It jumps. POP. That's what it would make if I had a soda machine attached to my wrist.
What should I ask for for my birthday? My dad is suddenly well-to-do. But I never want to be seen as a spoiled rich kid. I'm not. And my father has built himself from being practilically homeless to where he is now. SO fuck you if you ever thought I was rich and spoiled. You know my guitar? I saved up for months to get that thing. I paid for it by my own damn self. And my cell phone, and the majority of the video games I own. How dare you. Fuck your ovaries bitch. (that's just aimed at the general hating public)
Pour the paper mud in your eyes.
Did you know I like hairy vaginas? Not like forested, but a bushy lawn is pretty neat. It's part of my growing affinity for all things HAIR. Who knows, my i'll grow to like forests too.
But the wilderness still freaks me out. There aren't any street lamps and that's where psychopaths and rabbits live.
I don't get...it? Wha?
People don't scare me, my imagination does.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHAHHHHHHHHHHAHHHHHHHHHHHH
I'm spent.
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